Relationship Rescue for Wives and Girlfriends of Internet Pornography Addicts

Unmasking The Porn Monster





 
Porn has been around for thousands of years and will continue to exist in our world. PAH's main goal is relationship rescue when use or overuse of porn has brought imbalance to a relationship or marriage. It is important to note that not all online pornography is violent. There are many sites with non-graphic still shots or amateur postings. That being said, it seems the bizarre and the aggressive versions are gaining popularity. Many women are filled with fear when their loved one's addiction is discovered. Part of this fear is because porn is a topic that many women are not well versed. It is not necessary to go on a visual tour site by site to view first hand what it is all about. This may be as damaging to you as it is to your partner. It may be eye-opening to gain some level of knowledge as to what the porn industry is up to and more importantly why our culture is embracing it as acceptable and even 'cool'. The following synopsis includes graphic language and examples. All explicit text and examples will be posted on a separate page. You the reader can choose to read them, or not. This is an opinion and interpretation of trends in current pornography and do not necessarily represent the views and opinions of PAH.

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At the same conference, Gail Dines, Professor of Sociology and Women's Studies and Chair of American Studies at Wheelock College presented 
Pornography & Pop Culture: Putting the Text in Context. Again, her entire 62 minute presentation can be found online at Google Video. Please be warned that it does include graphic images and language.

Gail covers the evolution of the porn industry to where it is today - a medium that is increasingly aggressive, violent and degrading.

In 1953, Playboy became an overnight success and is now an institution. This post war era needed people to spend money to improve the economy following the tough depression and war strife. Hugh Hefner offered a way for men to think of themselves as consumers. The first few issues were about consumerism and did not contain many images of women. (!) Those images that did exist were only soft core. Penthhouse's goal was to go after Playboy's soft core market and then add harder images but advertisers fled. Hustler trumped them all and pressed the limits of acceptable pornography by excluding advertisers, as they would limit what images he could present.

US Annual Revenue from Pornography: $12 Billion
US Annual Box Office Revenue from Mainstream Films: $9 Billion

Many people believe that pornography has benefited from the advancement of technology. It is actually quite the reverse. Many of the advances in technology were initially driven by the market's desire to bring pornography closer to the home environment - faster connections, streaming video. The closer porn is to the home, the better the anonymity. The more anonymous you make porn use, the greater chance it will be used frequently. It is impossible to go to a cell phone trade show now without seeing large booths given to publishers of porn. Much of the current investment towards developing better screens on cell phones is from the porn industry. Pornography and technology go hand in hand.

Pop culture provides us with stereotypes of what is ideal masculinity and ideal femininity. Anyone 35 and older grew up in a print based culture. If you are 30 or younger, you grew up in an image based culture. If you see something in print, you can read it and judge if you agree or disagree. You can put it down and then choose if you want to reengage with it at a later time. When you are presented with an image, the human mind doesn't have the ability to choose whether or not you wish to engage with it or not. It is just visually taken in. You instantly will compare yourself with that image of femininity or masculinity presented. If media normalizes something - size 2, white, blonde hair, perfectly toned, airbrushed - you will always see yourself as lacking.

Many think that pornography is about women because the images portray women. 
Pornography is really the story of masculinity. Pornography is the place where men speak to each other using the female body.

We currently are living in a 'slut culture' - Lindsay Lohan, Christina Aguilara, Britney Spears. Paris Hilton had a little reputation and a big bank account before her boyfriend published a sex tape of them together on the Internet. She gained instant notoriety and became a mega-star. In previous generations, this would have ended a career. In today's culture it is elevated. Jenna Jameson is the first real porn star. She was the first to make a seamless transition from porn star to mainstream media. Nice car, nice clothes, big house - it makes the job seem enticing. Jenna's childhood is not surprising. Her mother died, her father was cold to her, and she ran away at age 16 to the strip clubs of Las Vegas. During her first audition she was told she looked too young as she had braces on. She went into the bathroom and with a pair of pliers ripped her braces off. She was gang raped by a rugby team as teenager and left for dead. She was raped again at 19 by her boyfriend's uncle. No surprise that she began using drugs at age 20. What is unusual abut her story? That she is alive at age 30 and is rich.  Now she is held up as an icon.

Pornography and pop culture are intertwined. Another example? Controversial pro-porn talk show host Howard Stern made $302 million in 2006. Who supports him? In Demand chose Howard Stern as their first on demand video offering. It is owned in part by Time-Warner and Comcast. Time-Warner also owns HBO which has a lot of pro-pornography shows late at night that help normalize pornography. Time-Warner also owns the WB Network which features a reality show with renowned porn director Ron Jeremy. Warner Books is also publishing a book called Boink based on the BU college sex magazines featuring provocative photos of real college students. Comcast makes huge revenue from the distribution of porn movies. Comcast also owns E! which features porn stars like Jenna Jameson. Etc. Etc. It is all connected.

Much of the former soft core porn has migrated itself to mainstream culture. The vast majority of accessible porn on the Internet is now hard core.  These sites are specifically created for their key clientele - white males. A majority of the women on porn sites are white. A few are Asian. African American women are not prominently featured on sites but appear mainly in 'Gonzo' pornography.  Gonzo porn refers to pornographic films which are filmed by a participant, and as such have eliminated fictional plot and scripted dialogue and focus solely on the sexual activity.

GRAPHIC EXAMPLES OF GONZO PORN

Most men that turn to pornography do not hate women. They live in a hyper sexual society. You may not be disrespectful of women when you first turn to porn, but you will leave the sites with a different attitude. You get much more than you bargained for when you ingest porn on a regular basis. It sexualizes the violence and the degradation against women. When you sexualize that violence, you render that violence invisible.

GRAPHIC EXAMPLES

It is distressing to have young men watch these scenes and connect orgasmic pleasure with a woman's pain.

Popular themes in Gonzo porn:



It is also important to understand that pornography puts lots of little scenarios in men's heads so that where ever you are, you can activate that particular scenario. Every interaction between men and women, and women and women, in pornography is sexual. You can have sex with: the Nanny, the Secretary, the Maid, the Nurse, the Teacher or the Student.

GRAPHIC EXPLANATION OF ARTICLES IN COLLEGE SEX MAGAZINES

A very popular genre of porn is that of 'barely legal'. These sites are run by very wealthy companies such as Hustler that would not want to run the risk of liability in hiring underage girls, however the sites often portray eighteen year olds as being much younger girls. Their bodies are hairless and they are often dressed in school girl uniforms. GRAPHIC EXAMPLES

What does it mean for our society when these images are so prevalent? When these images are no longer graphic enough? How bad does it have to get before we decide as a society that something has to be done? Pornographers have stolen our culture and without us barely making a peep. Pornography is to sex what McDonald's is to food. They strip it down and turn it into a plasticized, formulaic living, while making billions in the process, and they destroy the creative and life-affirming gift that it is.


IF YOU WISH TO READ THE GRAPHIC EXCERPTS
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